Self love is important to living well. It influences who you choose for a partner, the image you project at work, and how you cope with problems in your life. It is extremely important to your welfare and you should know how to bring more of it into your life so that you can start attracting people and circumstances to you that will support your wellbeing.
Self love is not simply a state of feeling good. It is a state of appreciation for yourself that grows from actions that support your physical, psychological and spiritual growth. Self love is dynamic. When you begin to accept your weaknesses as well as your strengths, you will have less need to explain away your short-comings and have compassion for yourself. You also become more centred in your life purpose and values and expect to live a fulfilling life through your own efforts.
Steps to help you become self loving
- Be gentle and kind to yourself – Be gentle, kind and patient with yourself and treat yourself as you would treat someone you really love.
- Support yourself - Find ways to support yourself. Reach out to friends and allow them to help you. Practice being your own best friend. It is being strong to ask for help when you need it.
- Stop comparing yourself to others – Also stop trying to live up to the expectations of what other people think you should be like. This is a self defeating response and will only lead to discouragement and a negative self image rather than self acceptance.
- Learn to become an optimist – Choose optimism and not pessimism. See the best in yourself, in life and in others.
- Stop all criticism - Criticism never changes a thing. Accept yourself exactly as you are. Criticism breaks down the inner spirit and praise builds it up. Praise yourself as much as you can. Tell yourself how well you are doing with every little thing.
- Stop negative messaging – Stop telling yourself unkind, negative messages that if repeated often enough will penetrate and you will then believe them to be true.
- Become focused - When you have self love you will generally think, feel and know what you want. You will be mindful of who you are and act on this knowledge, rather than on what others want for you. You will act on what you need rather than what you want. By staying focused on what you need, you turn away from behaviour patterns that could get you into trouble or keep you stuck in the past or could lessen self love.
- Self care - You will need to take better care of your basic needs by nourishing yourself daily with healthy activities, like good nutrition, exercise, proper sleep, healthy intimate and social interactions with daily positive affirmations.
- Set boundaries – You will need to set limits or say no to work, love, or activities that deplete or harm you physically, emotionally and spiritually and do not express clearly who you are.
- Respect yourself – Choose to bring the right people into your life. Friends that wish you happiness and success rather than those who seek pleasure in your pain and loss.
- Forgive yourself – Accept your humanness that mistakes are just learning curves of life. Remember, there are no failures, if you have learned and grown from your mistakes, there are only lessons to be learned.
- Live intentionally - You will accept and love yourself more, whatever is happening in your life, when you live with purpose. If your intention is to live a meaningful and healthy life, you will make decisions that support the intention and will feel good about yourself when you succeed in this purpose.